More synopsis joy

I seem to post here a lot about the synopsis. There's good reason for this. Authors are frequently called upon to reduce their 60,000-odd word novel to a page, a paragraph, even a pithy statement.

My pithy statement for this book? Bad TV talent shows and narcolepsy, together at last.

So it is I've been asked to write yet another synopsis for my novel None of the Other Flies Follow My Crooked Lines. It's probably my third or fourth attempt at this and it's never an easy task. Hell, it took me nine words to title the damn thing.

The new synopsis comes off the back of some intensive editing, so at least this time I have a strong grasp of what happens when in the story.

My personal problem with synopses is that I lapse into a prose style I would never contemplate in the story itself. I launch into breathless sentences full of clauses and subclauses. TO be honest, I don't know how else to do it. At some point you need to explain that Bunny is Liberty's mother and that Richo is the host of the television show, otherwise the reader of the synopsis has no idea what you're talking about.

I also tend to pose questions:

What went so wrong? Did Liberty really disappear or is this just another ratings stunt?And how can you trust your own story when the already blurred border between waking and dreaming states evaporates entirely? 

It's hokey, but, again, I don't know how else to condense the tension of a novel into such a small space.

As a novelist, I really shouldn't complain. Scriptwriters are required to do this kind of summary on stuff they haven't yet finished, and they have to pitch stuff in person. At least we get to hide behind letters and emails.